What It Really Means to Love “Like a Mother”

She stands in the kitchen looking at me. Her hair is stringy and needs to be brushed. She’s shifting from side to side uncomfortably, unsure of what I’m doing there or what to say. Her brother overdosed last night. Her mother is my good friend, and the swirling vortex of grief and community sucked me into her kitchen, stocking the refrigerator and tidying the counters because that feels like something when there’s nothing. “I don’t know how to make lasagna,” she says, glancing at the pan I’m sliding into the…

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There is No “Just” in Adoption

Just. Just. It’s such a simple little four letter word. And yet it’s a word that can make a conversation come to a screeching halt. A word that can invoke feelings of inferiority and shame in its recipient. It’s the conversational equivalent of a drive-by shooting. We have all experienced a drive-by justing, and most of us have been hurt by it because the word ‘just’ is irritating and belittling to anyone facing any kind of problem… “Just try harder,” “Just  change your perspective,” “Just get over it,” “Just ignore it,” “Just get…

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Why You Should Consider Adoption

When you think about children what is the first thing that comes to mind? Smiling, laughing, hugs, happiness? Those are all great words to describe the way that kids make us feel. They make us feel loved, appreciated and needed—and it is our job to do the same for them. Although, sometimes a challenge, I will admit. But what about those kids who have never had that return experience of being loved, nurtured, needed and appreciated? Yes, as sad as it is, those kids are out there and there are…

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